Sundered

RSS
Apr 8

Exit Wounds

It’s a lazy Sunday and I’m in a trauma bay watching an army of scrub-clad grunts go to work on a limp victim. The room is brightly lit, with fluorescent lamps making the star-shaped droplets of blood on the floor shine like patent leather. There is no music, no soundtrack to the madness; only the rustle of clothing and the deep baritone of the trauma surgeon as he stands, quarterback-like in the middle of the maelstrom, barking orders to his team.

I’m at the far end of the room behind a red line on the floor with the words “DO NOT CROSS” painted onto the tile in bold, fuck-off letters. Standing next to me is one of the vascular surgeon fellows - a tall basketball player of a woman wearing scrubs, surgical clogs and a physician’s coat so white that looks as though it just came back from the cleaners. She’s explaining the finer points of trauma medicine to me - the different stages of hypovolemic shock (a result of blood loss), how to tell a contact wound from a shot at a longer range (look for a star-shaped powder burn) and countless other small tidbits of information that I file away for a future cocktail party. Then, during a lull in the madness, she asks a question that catches me entirely off-guard.


“Do you know how the mafia used to execute traitors?” she whispers into my ear.

Read More

From My Pharmacology Syllabus

“hMGs [Human Menopausal Gonadotropins] are a mixture of partially metabolized human FSH and LH extracted from the urine of postmenopausal women.”

WHAT.

The gravity in this place is different. I’ve spoken to others who’ve traveled out here, too, and returned home safely. When you become one of them, you learn quickly that you share a language others can’t understand.

The trick, these fellow travelers tell me, is to accept the not knowing and find your equilibrium in that new gravity. Calm the mind. Find your balance out on the cold planet, whether or not you know the next step, or the date of the next appointment, or what good or bad news the Technetium-99 isotopes floating around in your blood during the last scan reveal.

You must be at peace with not knowing, they tell me. That is how you get through outer space, and find your way back home.

- Xeni Jardin, in a moving essay about her cancer diagnosis.

What causes these long-term mental problems? Why are concussions so dangerous? The answer returns us to the mechanics of head trauma. Because a concussion is not a bruise. It is not a sprain. There is no bodily metaphor for what happens when the Jell-O of cortex accelerates into the skull. Although the brain is surrounded by a cushion of cerebrospinal fluid, a severe impact or abrupt change in head speed can push those three pounds of meat straight through the fluid, so that it crashes into the cranium. (The brain has no pain receptors, which means the impact can only be perceived indirectly, as a throbbing headache or loss of consciousness.)

- Jonah Lehrer on high-school football concussions, via Grantland